Liz Roberson

 
 

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The Worst Friend I Ever Had

She stared back at me, waiting for my reply.
But what could I say? Her words knifed through me, once more:

Who do you think you are?

Better yet, she had continued, how can you possibly think that you’re cut out for this?

Do you even understand the kind of drive that it takes to do what you’re telling me you want to do? Years of paying dues. Rejection. Not to mention the sheer skill level involved. And you, quite frankly, do not possess it. Even if you HAVE what it takes, so do thousands of other people.

And have you seen yourself, lately? Not exactly marketable. Not very impressive at all.

Just what is it that you think you have going for you?

I took a deep breath. Sighed it back out.

She scowled at me. Nothing I could possibly say would convince her that I was capable of doing this. But was I capable? Or was she right? Why did I keep listening to her?

Her words always left me doubting. Confused. Fearful. Why did I keep listening to her?

I washed my hands and looked up at her again, wiping a smudge from the mirror in front of her now perfectly-made-up face. Why did I keep listening to her?

Because she is me.

 

Most of us would never dream of speaking to someone else the way that we speak to ourselves. Likely, you realized before it was even revealed that this was an inner monologue.

Because you’ve probably had similar conversations with yourself.

We can be so unkind. And 99% of it is pointed at ourselves.

Why do we save our kind and encouraging words for everyone else? And if we are truly capable of speaking such life into others, then it would be logical to assume that we are capable of speaking life over ourselves, as well. But many of us never do.

I know that if I had a friend who only spoke negativity and left me feeling more alone…I would kick that person to the curb. Maybe punch them in the throat. At the very least, they would not be allowed to speak into my life anymore. So who should?

Let the One who is Life speak over you. Read His words. Speak them over yourself.

Many of us have heard Proverbs 3:5-6:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.”

But we often forget to read on. There’s more in verses 7 & 8:

”Do not be wise in your own eyes;
Fear the Lord and turn away from evil.
It will be healing to your body
And refreshment to your bones.”

It’s always following our own flawed logic that ensnares us to the enemy. But fear of the Lord and acknowledging His words—His LIFE extended to us—this is healing to us. Life to dry bones.

And as I am healed and discover His friendship, I learn to be a better friend to myself, as well.

Comments

Wow! I was just having these battles. Great word. Confirmation to keep my sword up. Love you so much.
 

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